She’s Probably Shallow, Stupid, Boring

The second way men edit out women before they know them is to assume that the woman, physically attractive as she might be, would never be smart enough, interesting enough, passionate enough, or whatever enough, for him.

If these guys were to articulate this feeling, they would say something like, "Hot, stylish women are shallow, stupid, and not interested in anything except how they look. I just wouldn’t get along with a woman like that."

Before you instantly decide that YOU aren’t like that — you’d be happy to sleep with a vapid fashion model, tonight — be aware that many men think that they want that, but when it comes down to it, they really don’t. They like the fantasy of being with a shallow, hot woman, but in reality they aren’t into it. They really, truly want to be sexual with women they are attracted to, and whom they actually like.

Whether this describes you or not, a lot of men edit out women thinking that, hot though the women may be, they don’t seem like someone the guy would like. Another man we know did this with a woman he met though a social group he was part of.

"She was cute, but I just assumed I wouldn’t like her, because she didn’t seem like the kind of woman I normally went for — she seemed really girly, and I assumed she’d be shallow and dumb." But that didn’t turn out to be true. "As I spent more time with her, by accident, as we were hanging out with the same people — I saw that she was nothing like I originally thought she’d be. I really liked her and she really turned me on." They started dating and got into a relationship.

It’s worth asking, how many women like that were out there for him? How many such women got "edited out" of his mental list of women he could date, because he assumed instantaneously that he wouldn’t like them?

This is not to say that if you stop editing out women, all women will automatically like you, or that you will automatically like all the women you are physically attracted to. But it will help end the problem we hear from men over and over — even from men who live in cities full of hot, available women, like New York City or Los Angeles — that there are no women they can date.

If you currently edit out 99% of the women you could possibly approach, before you even think about them (and many men do), and you reduce that to only editing out 94% of possible women, you have increased your pool of possible women by a huge percentage! That’s good news — it’s a small change that could make a big difference.

If you understand that you have been editing out far more women than you need to, you will be able to get more women into your dating system, and get a lot more of what you want from them.

Please visit our site if you have any questions or would like more detailed information on how to meet more high-quality women.

Best of luck!

Posted in: Where to meet great women